It is so important, especially as a leader, to not lose your cool and become angry. There are some leaders who believe that anger will keep the troops in check and will serve as a reminder as to who is in charge. Here is the reality: when leaders and executives become angry, everyone else around them will shut down, operating in an unhealthy state of fear. When a leader becomes angry and raises his tone of voice, changes his body language, and shows a facial expression as if someone is about to die, employees will lock up and wish that they were in a better place. Any positivity, creativity, contributions, or enthusiasm just goes right out the window. The anger brings everyone down.
It also does something else: when people become angry, they are seen as being out of control. The perception is that if they can’t manage their frustration and temper, they are not in control. If they are not in control, they can’t lead. Your ability to lead is not something that you want your employees to call into question. Each time you show an act of anger, your credibility as a leader, and your ability to lead, is diminished. Great leaders keep their cool even in difficult times, or when they are hit with bad news. They listen, they analyze, they review, and then they work on solutions. They don’t fly off the handle.
To illustrate my point, years ago I remember being in a sales meeting reviewing deals and forecasts for the end of a sales quarter. All sales managers were in the room as well as the VP of Sales. Each sales manager had to present their forecast and provide the details as to how they would deliver on their forecasted number. We knew that the head of sales had a temper and would often become angry in meetings so the tension was already pretty thick. The room was dead-quiet as each manager presented their numbers. After the last manager gave his forecast, the head of sales pushed back in his chair and became upset by raising his voice questioning the credibility of the forecasts, and openly doubting that they were accurate. He then spoke to himself out loud stating that this was the same nonsense that he heard last quarter. “Unbelievable! I can’t believe what I am hearing! Here we go again!” As the head of sales spoke these words, everyone in the room just looked down at the table and wished that they could have disappeared. After speaking these words in an angry tone of voice, he then weaved in the threat that these numbers better be met or else…
On that final note, the meeting then ended. Everyone in the room walked out in complete silence. If you weren’t scared or stressed out, you were definitely not as positive and happy as you were before the meeting. So what did this kind of anger do for the sales managers? Not only did it cause fear, but it completely took the air out of everyone’s balloon. People jumped into survival mode. No one wants to listen to or see a leader go off in rage only to feel like they are going to die if they don’t perform.
Over time this behavior continued. It resulted in many of the managers leaving the company. Great talent and potential walked right out the door. The cost to the company must have been significant. This is what anger will do. It prevents good, healthy cultures from being created. It magnifies employee turnover. It destroys trust and loyalty. And… it also keeps many employees from performing their best. What employee is going to speak up and talk about a potentially great idea when they know that their head could get chopped off if the boss didn’t like what they had to say?
For all of the above, this is why there is no place for anger within the leadership ranks. As a leader, you are better off by staying calm, taking a pause, thinking for a moment or two, and then in a cool, collective manner, responding in a relaxed tone of voice. A great leader will do this. They can handle the bad news. They can handle the pressure. They can handle themselves without losing their temper and becoming angry. Their subordinates will admire how they can handle stressful or difficult situations in such a calm manner. This builds culture. It also builds trust and loyalty. Doing this allows leaders to focus their energy and attention on working the problem or situation versus becoming emotionally drained by getting upset which does not do anything to help solve any problem or situation.
In sum, don’t get angry! Easier said than done. I know. This requires a lot of practice. So to get you started, there is one simple thing that you can do. The next time you catch yourself starting to become angry, just pause and don’t say or do anything. That’s right, don’t say a word. Just pause for a few seconds and remember this article. These few seconds of pause will allow you to take a different path than an angry one. As a manager, I would often go for a brief walk immediately after getting hit with a problem or some bad news. Just a few minutes is all that I needed. I would collect my thoughts and then focus my energy on how I wanted to handle the situation. No anger. I transmuted that potential anger (energy) into focusing on a solution. I didn’t yell or flip out at anyone. This solution kept me grounded and calm. My employees, my peers, and my customers saw this in me. It helped me get to the top!
-Happy Selling!