How many times do you want to play that heated conversation or interaction with someone over and over again in your head, causing only negative emotions and frustration? Replaying a negative experience in your mind is a massive energy drain and it keeps you focused on negativity and that is not what you want in selling or in life. You have to learn how to let things go. Let me give you a couple of tips so that the next time you encounter a negative experience or interaction with someone, it won’t be as bothersome and you will move on quickly. This allows you to focus on what you do best- being a happy you, giving it your all, and selling!
A few pointers- It is NOT the actual event or action or what transpires that matters, it is your reaction to it. Example: you are driving to work and a car cuts you off. Your old you would get upset, maybe say some nasty words towards the other driver, try and floor the motor to try and cut the other driver off to level the playing field, and so on. Nevertheless, the event would upset you and interfere with your day in a negative manner. But does it have to be this way? Now let’s look at the new way of handling the other driver cutting you off on your way to work. Instead of getting frustrated, you pause, and you feel bad for the guy. You think that maybe he is very late for a meeting and you wish him the best. You don’t get bent out of shape, act in rage, or let his action ruin your morning. Instead you just let it go. How better do you think you will feel taking this route versus getting upset?
Another pointer- when negative thoughts begin to creep into your mind, such as a client not showing up for your appointment, or with losing a sale, let that negative thought go like a cloud in the sky. I want you to remember this analogy. Just let that negative thought pass by like a cloud in the sky. Can you visualize this?
A third tip- when you keep replaying a negative experience, let’s say a customer said to you that he was going to move ahead with your proposal by Friday but then Friday came and went and he never signed it. You had gotten upset because you were counting on that sale coming in. You get more upset because you thought that the customer is not a man of his word and lied to you. So you keep playing this record over and over again and you can’t seem to break the pattern and snap out of it.
Here is what I want you to do: find a quiet place with no distractions. Sit down and relax your mind and your body for a few minutes. Literally tell yourself that you are completely relaxed and calm, both in mind and in body. Feel your body relaxing. You are now at ease. Then I want you to say these words, “I forgive my customer. I am sure that he means well and is an honest person that does right by his company. I believe in him and he believes in me. I wish him only the best and I know that everything will all work out and I will be just fine.” Upon saying this, let the event pass now. You have moved on and by expressing such positive thoughts towards your customer and those positive vibes will only help you moving forward. If needed, you can do this on paper too by literally writing this out on a sheet of paper. When finished writing. Smile and then crumble up the sheet of paper and throw it away. You are now free from the event.
Learn to let things go. This takes PRACTICE. I promise you that unless you are mindful of the above ways of handling these things and unless you practice, the next time something goes sideways, you will have a kneejerk reaction to get upset. You have been wired to do so for many years. It takes time to rewire your thought process.
One last comment on this. If you have tried the above to no avail, make sure that your ego is in check. Often times, we get upset and can’t let things go, because we are struck by the fact that we can’t believe someone would do such a thing, or by the thought, “I would never do that” or, by the thought, “I can’t believe he spoke to me like that!” This is your ego. This is how you think and how you would never have said that or acted that way. Well, the other person is not you. They may not share your beliefs, values, and way of doing business. Don’t let your ego get in the way and keep you upset over how someone else acted compared to how you would have acted. They are not you. What they do and how they handle themselves is their business, not yours. So just be mindful that you may need to check if your ego is getting in the way preventing you from letting go and moving on.
-Enjoy Life!